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Salty confetti help

salanderson

By salanderson
in Tours

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salanderson Escapee

salanderson

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Now I'd like you to all try and be serious for a minute here. The thought of consuming my own sperm is a harrowing one that I don't even care to consider let alone carry out.

 

I am however willing to try tasting my own sperm if we all believe it will cure the saltiness without having to go and see a doctor.

 

I am going to ignore the joking and just listen to the serious folks in this thread and see what they have to say on the matter.

JessicaSarahS Guiding Light

JessicaSarahS

Posted
Posted
The only chance he has had to seek medical attention he has been rejected as a prank caller. Brilliant.

 

Don't you have an urgent care/walk-in type place? Tell them what you are experiencing first, then tell them about the confetti after. Medical personnel have heard so many crazier stories than yours, believe it or not. So I highly doubt you are making the true, honest efforts to seek medical attention. Call poison control and get a referral if necessary. If people can get help for shoving odd, poisonous things up their ass, I'm sure you can get help for stupidly putting something poisonous in your mouth.

lalalive Escapee

lalalive

Posted
Posted
The only chance he has had to seek medical attention he has been rejected as a prank caller. Brilliant.

 

How did you explain the situation to them? Perhaps you should just go in? Find the address and go. It's free!

 

I would have only waited this long because I would be going insane trying to figure out how I could pay for the consultation.

sangforabsolution Escapee

sangforabsolution

Posted
Posted

You guys know this all a giant hoax, right? I can't believe some people believe this. Ok, you had me when you caught the confetti and tasted it. But then your story just evolved into such ridiculous proportions that it is parallel to a bloody fairy tale. You tried taking MDMA and washing your mouth out with shampoo? I can't wait to see what's next in your story.

 

You may be a funny storyteller and all, but are you seriously thinking I'm going to believe this garbage? I'm sorry to be a buzzkill to everyone, but you all have to be quite thick to believe this is all a true story.

Pythagorus Escapee

Pythagorus

Posted
Posted
Maybe he's trying to get warm & fuzzy feelings about the persistent salty taste. But yeah' date=' this is one guy who [i']really[/i] shouldn't be doing any more drugs.

 

It's easy to laugh at salanderson, but there's a very good chance he's making some unenviable medical history here, and that his case will be published in a medical journal someday (or written up in an otolaryngology blog or somesuch). Doctors love oddball cases and gossiping -- er, consulting and comparing notes -- about them, so at the very least his story will circulate through the UK medical community...

 

 

There is a thing called confidentiality today... (although I do suspect colleagues will talk amongst themselves as you've said... but throughout the UK medical community...?)

 

Also its not really a big deal, confetti damaged his tastebuds. And it isn't as if finding out what happened and then finding a treatment will do the general population much good - as they don't eat confetti. Who is going to waste money funding a research paper on dangers of eating confetti.

 

Also Sanderson, just go to the doctor. They won't be so shocked and it is all confidential. Do you have any other symptoms apart from the salty taste such as fever? tiredness?

 

You tried MDMA?!?!?!

Anxyous Escapee

Anxyous

Posted
Posted
You guys know this all a giant hoax, right? I can't believe some people believe this. Ok, you had me when you caught the confetti and tasted it. But then your story just evolved into such ridiculous proportions that it is parallel to a bloody fairy tale. You tried taking MDMA and washing your mouth out with shampoo? I can't wait to see what's next in your story.

 

You may be a funny storyteller and all, but are you seriously thinking I'm going to believe this garbage? I'm sorry to be a buzzkill to everyone, but you all have to be quite thick to believe this is all a true story.

 

Really, you can't make this stuff up.

Helen T Escapee

Helen T

Posted
Posted

Also, when you go to the doctor, it might be a good idea to take a sample of the confetti you ate, if you have any left. That way, if you have any further investigations they may be able to work out which chemical caused the damage

crazydays Escapee

crazydays

Posted
Posted
You guys know this all a giant hoax, right? I can't believe some people believe this. Ok, you had me when you caught the confetti and tasted it. But then your story just evolved into such ridiculous proportions that it is parallel to a bloody fairy tale. You tried taking MDMA and washing your mouth out with shampoo? I can't wait to see what's next in your story.

 

You may be a funny storyteller and all, but are you seriously thinking I'm going to believe this garbage? I'm sorry to be a buzzkill to everyone, but you all have to be quite thick to believe this is all a true story.

 

shh, buzzkill :chuckle:

Niall Dead Star

Niall

Posted
Posted
How did you explain the situation to them? Perhaps you should just go in? Find the address and go. It's free!

 

I would have only waited this long because I would be going insane trying to figure out how I could pay for the consultation.

 

What on Earth are you doing here!?

 

Maybe he's trying to get warm & fuzzy feelings about the persistent salty taste. But yeah' date=' this is one guy who [i']really[/i] shouldn't be doing any more drugs.

 

It's easy to laugh at salanderson, but there's a very good chance he's making some unenviable medical history here, and that his case will be published in a medical journal someday (or written up in an otolaryngology blog or somesuch). Doctors love oddball cases and gossiping -- er, consulting and comparing notes -- about them, so at the very least his story will circulate through the UK medical community...

 

Nope.

Guest jessychickin

Guest jessychickin

Posted
Posted

I love this thread... So much :')

a-museing Escapee

a-museing

Posted
Posted
You're correct that I need to acquire an appointment with a medical professional. The only problem is is that I moved to Manchester today (from Brighton) and don't have the faintest idea of the location of my local surgery.

 

I'm thinking of writing to Muse management and asking if they have had any similar problems reported, it's bound to be a problem with more than just myself.

You should. Make sure to post the response on here. :D

I still can't figure out if this for reals! :LOL::erm::confused::stunned:

 

+1 :chuckle:

plug_in_amy Escapee

plug_in_amy

Posted
Posted
it's a shame a certain female movie star isn't a member here, i'm sure they could give you tips on how to remove the salty taste of muse

 

Bahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!

:LOL::LOL::LOL:

 

wolsten-sperm!

wipes tear :chuckle:

 

my friend swallowed a load of the stuff from the PIB balloons, i shall ask her what it tasted like :awesome:

i have some of the confetti, is it bad that im tempted to try some? :shifty:

Pythagorus Escapee

Pythagorus

Posted
Posted
Also, when you go to the doctor, it might be a good idea to take a sample of the confetti you ate, if you have any left. That way, if you have any further investigations they may be able to work out which chemical caused the damage

 

 

Hahahaha that made me laugh out loud. :LOL:

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