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Zachary Guitars, wow


zooropa1310

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Zachary Handcrafted Guitars

(NOT custom!)

 

http://www.zacharyguitars.com/index.html

 

150109_002.jpg

 

A really interesting guitar builder I found... Apparently, you have to "audition" and prove your worth to get a guitar from this guy. Arrogant, an asshole, even "disowns" devote customers if he finds out they buy another guitar (ones he deems shite). The designs are unique, a bit on the crazy artist side. But I kind of see what he is on about. Here are some quotes from him on the site throughout:

 

Is a Zachary guitar for you?

 

I need to know more about YOU and what kind of person and player you are.

 

Remember one thing; I do not make custom guitars.

 

I make guitars as I chose and what I like. Whatever interests me at any particular time.

---------------------------------------

If you like what I made, then I may sell it to you, if I feel that it suits you and you will be able to appreciate it.

 

Regardless of how much money you have, I will not sell you any guitar if I feel its not right for you or that you don't deserve to own it.

If its not right for you then you will not appreciate it. This is of no advantage to either one of us if my guitars are not what you need or deserve.

 

Please understand that buying a guitar from a builder is very different from buying a guitar from a store. A store does not care who they sell to as long as they sell as much as possible. Its your money they are after. People who own or work at music stores are not emotionally attached to any of their products. With me its a very different situation.

When you buy a handmade guitar from the builder, you are taking a part of the builder with you. A handmade guitar is a personal creation and has emotions attached to it.

 

About his building and why they are the best

Finishes: I don't pull a condom over my guitars in the form of thick plastic finish. Thick plastic finishes are done for one purpose and that is to give a dramatic glassy covering to the figured wood underneath. Thick plastic finishes do not allow the player to ever feel the sentuous wood of their guitars and these awful coverings keep the sound of the guitar in, instead of letting it out. Its very much like having sex with a condom. I have never tried this but they tell me its nothing like the real experience.

 

On buying a guitar from him

Anyone can buy a Zachary Guitar, however you need to follow the procedure to qualify. Its very simple actually. You need to send me a video of yourself playing the guitar. Just a simple video of you sitting in a chair playing. Sound quality is of no concern. I will then forward this video to the Z Committee - the inner circle - (a group of dedicated Z guitar owners), who will decide whether or not a Z guitar is right for you or if you even need a Zachary Guitar.

 

On music stores

Somehow you felt like a victim in such a music store, the experience nothing short of being molested. You left the store feeling you did something dirty, like walking into some extreme hard-core sex shop or similar moral shortcoming. Somehow you regretted, almost in shame, even walking into such a place and promise yourself you will never go back there again, all the while hoping that nobody discovers you were ever there. A sense of shame comes over you after the experience. However, just as with the sex shop, you ended up back there again for no explainable reason, other than human weakness. The store owner was always smiling, but his salesmen were slick, street-smart, young thugs who would watch their boss for every sign, surreptitiously working together in supported of the "hunt", taking their cues and carrying out the dirty work in closing the sale.

 

Full story in this page on a guitar that's posted to "sell," (("If you see a guitar listed as available, it is not there because I don't have a buyer. Its because I am in the process of deciding who to sell it to, by qualifying the best person to own it, the one who needs it the most and can use it the best. Please remember, this is not a retail store. Your money or your status means nothing to me and you must qualify for a Zachary guitar. As you can see, only a very small number of these guitars are made each year, so they must go to the right individuals."))

 

http://www.zacharyguitars.com/150109pics.htm

 

His custom Kent Armstrong pickups

http://www.zacharyguitars.com/ZachAttack.htm

 

A post in a message board from one of his two time customers

Alex is very passionate about what he does and his work shows that, but his obsessiveness makes him hard to deal with. I am a good example of that actually, I have said nothing but great things about his guitar and defended his ways many times here on this forum, but when he found out I had purchased a 550 reissue he got upset and offended and refused to sell me another guitar. He actually went out of his way to cut me out of his "inner circle" and refunded the deposit I had put down for over a year...

 

 

 

 

He has his own line of strings, pedals, and a tube amp as well.

 

Strings - Equal tension across the line.

http://www.zacharyguitars.com/Strings.htm

 

Amp - $700 8 Watt tube

http://www.zacharyguitars.com/Skank.htm

 

Pedal - $400 overdrive boost

http://www.zacharyguitars.com/Pedals.htm

 

 

Anyways... I think it is a really, really interesting thing he has going. He is quite a character, extremely arrogant, but I can understand his passion. Although it is extreme, I don't think it is misplaced.

 

 

Although he is not in it for the money (he owns a music store that sells horns/music etc) and see's big marketing companies as evil, this "marketing technique" is brilliant.

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Its very much like having sex with a condom. I have never tried this but they tell me its nothing like the real experience.

 

the experience nothing short of being molested

 

like walking into some extreme hard-core sex shop

just as with the sex shop, you ended up back there again for no explainable reason, other than human weakness

 

 

That's possibly the most Freudian sales pitch I've ever read. Presumably he was molested in a sex shop by someone who wasn't wearing a condom and that's what turned him into a socially incapable bellend.

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[spoiler=Zachary guitar pedal]Does my pedal look cool or what? That hand engraving is extremely cool, as is the gigantic rubber knob and improved spacing of knobs. Like something you might find inside a raw professional racing car or even in one of those funny cars to trigger the ejection seat or parachute. Unpainted metal, gigantic rubber knob where the boost tone switch used to be, hand lettered. The knob spacing is better on the finished pedal. Easy to sneak your right foot over to the boost level knob without hitting either the switches or the other knobs by accident. Is it the coolest electric guitar pedal ever? Very possible. There are other analog effects I like, like echoplexes and stuff but this is the coolest pedal. I cannot part with it now and it has had a pronounced effect on what and how I play.

 

Pedal_05.JPG

 

 

Please tell me this is a crap joke.

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[spoiler=Zachary guitar pedal]Does my pedal look cool or what? That hand engraving is extremely cool, as is the gigantic rubber knob and improved spacing of knobs. Like something you might find inside a raw professional racing car or even in one of those funny cars to trigger the ejection seat or parachute. Unpainted metal, gigantic rubber knob where the boost tone switch used to be, hand lettered. The knob spacing is better on the finished pedal. Easy to sneak your right foot over to the boost level knob without hitting either the switches or the other knobs by accident. Is it the coolest electric guitar pedal ever? Very possible. There are other analog effects I like, like echoplexes and stuff but this is the coolest pedal. I cannot part with it now and it has had a pronounced effect on what and how I play.

 

Pedal_05.JPG

 

 

Please tell me this is a crap joke.

 

:LOL: :LOL:

 

rubber knob

 

edit: GIGANTIC rubber knob

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[spoiler=Zachary guitar pedal]Does my pedal look cool or what? That hand engraving is extremely cool, as is the gigantic rubber knob and improved spacing of knobs. Like something you might find inside a raw professional racing car or even in one of those funny cars to trigger the ejection seat or parachute. Unpainted metal, gigantic rubber knob where the boost tone switch used to be, hand lettered. The knob spacing is better on the finished pedal. Easy to sneak your right foot over to the boost level knob without hitting either the switches or the other knobs by accident. Is it the coolest electric guitar pedal ever? Very possible. There are other analog effects I like, like echoplexes and stuff but this is the coolest pedal. I cannot part with it now and it has had a pronounced effect on what and how I play.

 

Pedal_05.JPG

 

 

Please tell me this is a crap joke.

 

is the letter between the t and d meant to be an f or an l?

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never heard a good word said about him, and never seen a guitar of his iv ever even remotely liked.

the BEST thing iv heard someone say about him is "poor mans ed roman".

 

and thats really not a good thing

 

Well what are the bad things that have been said about them? :chuckle:

 

When I heard dumble would only build amps for people that were good enough (or something along those lines), and that if you bother him even ONCE during the time he's building, the deal is off and you lose your money. that made me think he was a dick.

 

But this takes the cake. He's like ed roman with some crystal lattice mixed in...but..worse..

 

Also:

 

When you buy a handmade guitar from the builder, you are taking a part of the builder with you. A handmade guitar is a personal creation and has emotions attached to it.

 

Right, so if I WAS worthy enough to buy one of this guy's guitars, it would have something wrong in the headstock....if that's a good way to put it.

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Right, so if I WAS worthy enough to buy one of this guy's guitars, it would have something wrong in the headstock....if that's a good way to put it.

 

hahaha

 

and here was me thinking that the whole point in buying a custom guitar was to get what you (the customer) wanted and not what the builder felt like giving you

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Just had a good look through his website

 

A Few Great Comments About Zachary Guitars and Their Creator

 

"I can't say I see much of anything I admire on Zachary's website in terms of design, ideology or attitude." Mattia -hobbyist guitar tinkerer and full time guitar forums poster (Amsterdam, NL)

 

If money were no object I'd become the biggest collector of his "guitars", and every year I'd host a huge party where every guest gets to smash one to smithereens and throw it on the enormous fire built entirely out of his high priced firewood. Personally , I'd like to "earn" one of his guitars by smashing his head in with one!

Walpole, Ma. - Jeff 'Houndog' Porter - part time tinkerer/full time guitar chat room poster

 

I just find it all amusing. Realistically, in a few days, no one will care, one way or another. We all know this. You see, Zach (or whatever his name is) has it all wrong. He's the mouse in that image. He's already killed himself. His attitude is his metaphorical mouse trap. His guitar building career is dead and we're the cats pawing at it for our own amusement. - thegarehanman - professional nameless guitar forum poster (Baton Rouge, Louisiana)

 

 

So I take it he googles 'zachary guitars' looking to see what people think, and posts the negative comments on his website like that to make himself feel better?

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Rubbish headstock design...

 

http://www.zacharyguitars.com/150109_009.jpg

 

No covers on the back for the electronics?

 

http://www.zacharyguitars.com/150109_014.jpg

 

There's also an article on his site about how he made a guitar out of a $15 bit of wood from Ikea and sold the resulting product for $1500... I feel sorry for the poor soul that purchased that, lol.

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