My head's fine I've never had a hangover! I want to talk to you tonight but I have an assignment due tomorrow

It was okay I'm just chilling now

Fuck I love you <3

I'm on my phone man! I'm in a club

Bro love you I want to root Em

BUT HOW CAN I?!

I am drunk.

Why the hell can't anyone be as awesome as you and I?

I am so fucking amazing

I WANT YO' TRIFLE

Bro, I can't even fucking see straight, wine kicks in so damn fast

Look further!

And I might be... Damn you, wine...

Then send me some damn trifle!

-waves banhammer-

Nah, I don't even think we're going to the pub now we got the wrong night for the rugby game.

Cheer you up? http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/instagram-quote-rebuttals-hipster-edits

Apparently we're not going out now... oh well. I'll still be going to the pub, I might have a couple still

It's okay, it'll go nicely with my AIDS.

Nah, just had a chill night with Sophie and Rory. Am about to sleeeeeeeep... Also, I'm drinking wine tomorrow so expect some damn sloppy texting

NEVER

I'll consider it, only if you dress like Pocoyo.

I actually only have 70c on my phone, which is 2 texts

Maybe. Expect texts on Saturday by the way, I have no choice in the matter but to get drunk apparently.

Dream of super awesome shit <3

I am still awake, don't hate

Up your bellend.