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About paranoiawilldestroy

  • Rank
    It should be so easy
  • Birthday 10/20/1982

Personal Information

  • Biography
  • Location
  • Interests
    I just want to be
  • Occupation
  • Gender
  • Favourite Bands
    Too many and varied to mention. Understand that music is about taste, not prestige.

    However on those that listen only to one genre of music to differentiate yourself from the crowd... look forward to your mid-life crisis.
  • Favourite Films
    Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
    Fight Club
    A Life Aquatic
    City of God
    Little Nicky
    Lord of The Rings
    The Hobbit when it comes out. It will be a favourite oh yes yes
  • Favourite TV Shows
    I love the news... can't get enough of that shit.
  • Favourite Books
    Best Fantasy Authors:
    Robin Hobb
    Michael Moorcock
    Early Tad Williams
    Tolkien (obviously)
    Stephen Donaldson
    Poor old Scott Lynch... keep it together man I'm rooting for you. But hurry up and write the third part of that trilogy cos it's awesome.

    John Connolly
    Stieg Larsson (A very important book to my mind... R.I.P.)
    Carlos Ruiz Zafon
    Susannah Clarke
    Lian Hearn
  • Muse Releases Owned
    Gotta version of Origin Of Symmetry from Avalanche in Glasgow... came out three days early, had a clear silver box with a key to open it. Sold the rest of all my other CD's to buy Christmas presents one year but have since redeveloped my collection (legally, mostly) through the wonderful power of the Internet. Needless to say, Muse feature heavily.
  • Muse Concerts Attended / Attending
    Glasgow Barrowlands gig (2001 I think)
    Three times at the SECC.
    Once in Dublin with Kasabian supporting.

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  1. So... a few (20) years back. I was a tone deaf, truly awful singer, with a mental health condition that caused delusions of grandeur. Tough break, I suppose. One of the triggers for the onset of this condition was Origin of Symmetry. I was already a big Muse fan, then one fateful night I dropped over 30 pills. Never quite came back. For over a year I struggled, then eventually popped. I was listening to Origin, and my state of mind was not good. I began to believe that Muse (specifically Matt Bellamy) had written Origin to encourage peeps to sing. I felt that the album was aimed at people who couldn't sing, but were... plagued by the knowledge that art was being undermined by capitalist forces. Matt was searching for people like him (blah, blah, yeah I know, I was nuts), in that he wanted people who felt like he did when he discovered he could sing... To make the same imaginative leap that he did. It is worth pointing out that I was into writing, then as now and have a relationship with music, as a listener. Music has buoyed me through some dark times, because music for me is like a support network. Anything ever felt by anyone at any point has an echo in some recording, somewhere. Then, as now, I'm fascinated by this feature. I considered that if Matt had discovered his vocal abilities later in life than (normal), it must be possible for me to sing. Sadly, the condition of my narcotic addled mind launched me into a manic belief that I could immediately sing. That I rocked. I had no musical training. So fast forward 10 years from this point. I've gone to mental hospital. Come out. Been correctly told I couldn't sing. I eventually go to uni, to study Sociology and History, and learn about social construction. I also learn about a culture of beautiful singers during the enslavement of Africa, and that the idea of intrinsic talent is highly problematic, from the perspective of social construction. There is a wealth of phenomena world-wide that supports that social construction theory is at least partly accurate (and potentially absolutely. I also in my infinite wisdom chose to come off my tablets. 10 years later, I'm well again and wiser for that experience. I also became interested in practicing my singing again, with little regard for the opinions of my friends and family in this. Fact is, in an industrial society (I reasoned) we may have forgotten that singing as an art form is a skill, not a talent. This is how I'm sounding now: If I'm right, I think Matt Bellamy did undergo a tumultous time, centered around him trying to convince his loved ones that he could sing, that it was possible for him to develop his voice, when he had shown no real gift for it before then. I wonder how quickly a child prodigy on instruments might intuitively make the progress which took me a good 7 years... Although I've probably peaked without getting actual lessons, and I'm obviously nowhere near the level of a professional, never mind his level. I suppose the good thing about my experience is that I came through it, and realised that I didn't need to lead my life letting other people make my choices (which conversely stopped me making all the wrong ones). I'm now working on a book, and hope to finish the bloody thing this year.
  2. Alright dudes? Showbiz, the album, was a detailed study of an individual response to capitalist structure in a microcosm. Namely, that working class people are anathema to the creative soul. Your family will try to redirect you, schools will teach you to prefer to sit like a battery chicken in a call centre. And you're only ever as tall as your best friends. I've read studies about why working class people gravitate towards working class jobs. Sunburn was about family, for example. Someone was burning Bellamy's horizons, because he wanted to please. If you have an imagination, you begin, quite naturally to question if your social situation is wrong. This is the root of metal illness in the modern age... what else is anxiety except the product of a frustrated question, constantly spiralling out of control? I have a wee story to tell. It involves an imagination fuelled by copious drug use (psychosis) and an interpretation of Origin of Symmetry and Absolution that occured to me whilst deep within that psychosis. Clearly, the boundaries between what was real and what was imagined were blurred at at point in my life... Though I still think the interpretation stumbled across a truth. Bellamy went (possibly) through a similar experience to me, at some point in his life and equipped with manic self confidence unlocked his singing voice. Basically, equipped with mania he poured himself into the aforementioned endeavour... and through rigorous practice beasted that shit. I would suggest that anyone can sing, but someone with a trained musical ear, bloody stubborn mindedness and a powerful imagination would find that leap almost instinctive, if they could break away from the negation from their working class environment. i.e. I have no musical ear. Didn't even study music at school. Years after my breakdown I tried to come off my tablets. Didn't do much good for my psyche but... it got me interested in singing again. Coupled with my degree in Sociology (which revolves around the concept of social construction) and the interpretation that it was possible (evidenced by Origin and Absolution) I started experimenting. The above link is the result. Five years it took me and while I'm a long way away from pro I've still improved a fair bit. Language is the very basis of thought. Try picturing something in your head without using words. Any success? Returning to this idea of language, you now speak a different language from everyone else, if you have the bravery to follow. This (I would suggest) makes you potentially powerful, certainly if you break from the scriptures of the system that broke you in the first place. I reckon Supermassive Black Hole is a tongue-in-cheek look at that original decision to seek out Showbiz. Bellamy can see that he is getting more distant from his original self, because of the effect of being in Showbiz for so long. And that, I would argue, is the reason for the decline in the quality of recent albums. I see that power that he had dwindling aand I wonder, does he too? Resistance always starts from below. Did you know that the USA came very close to nukeing Vietnam? It did. Only popular dissent due to the civil rights movements of the 60s dissuaded the then administration of the USA from that reather horrible course of action. There are documents detailing the decison NOT to nuke Vietnam. I would suggest that the role of the truly imaginative in art is to nurture other imaginative artists so that more questions are asked. Not to pump cash into record executives' wallets. Music is a vast record of every emotion ever felt. That is its power. Bellamy has the capacity to inspire a whole new generation of artists, but he is squandering that promise I think, by broadening the appeal of the Muse brand. I'm not saying this a conscious decision, just a matter of taking the wrong advice (for self-serving record industry pricks). Go underground again Muse, please... Inspire us.
  3. Ok. I'm gonna be a silent partner in this group... I have my own reasons for not speaking out and they are basically that it would be counter-productive. But here's the basic: Hang tight people... school doesn't last forever. Also, under no circumstances be the first one of your friends to experiment with narcotics (I know, that will never happen blah blah blah). If you love something that deeply, letting go will make you unhappy.
  4. I'm a bloke yes. But I did shed a tear when I heard "Working Class Hero" I freely admit that.
  5. Jeezo... I'd buy them a pint. Then... dance like a test-lab monkey that needed a pee.
  6. I'd suggest that Twilight was written with one aim in mind (probably by a group of ghost-writers, with one person fronting it) to make as much buddo as possible. A ragtag collection of unaccepted scripts sent in by other writers to Time Warner may well have been the basis for the novel. It is in my mind the most inane and boring vampire story I've ever seen. I watched the film till half-way through and switched it off. Read the book? You having a laugh? I'm not sure that boredom can be terminal but if I ever wanted to find out the "Twilight Saga" would be my first port of call. Anyway I'm still typing but only to make it clear why I hate Twilight so much. S'pose it's good to get peeps into reading but if I ever actually see somebody giving a kid Twilight to read I'll have to take action; probably involving a branding iron. Books are fun, please don't bore children away from reading. Give 'em The Hobbit.
  7. Here's a question... battle of the survivors. Pearl Jam vs. Radiohead? Yield vs. O.K Computer? My vote is O.K Computer I reckon... but Pearl Jam rock my boat too. P.S. Eddie Vedder did the soundtrack for a film based on a book called "Into The Wild" and within this beautiful album there is a cover of a song called "Society". I highly suggest some avid listening to this tune... it might be my theme tune.
  8. I don't believe in predestination. But maybe, occasionally... if enough people wish for something that wish will be granted.
  9. It's easy to change people's minds when you've got a gun to their head, yes. Getting them to question their beliefs is substantially harder.
  10. I hate all religion, but respect Martin Luther... What do you think of the religion of science?
  11. I'm the ickle one on the left...


    Love is the Law, Faith is the Key

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