your thar she blows post officially makes you my favourite muser. I send good vibes and unicorn wishes your way.

the chair is a necessary prop, obviously wordplay alone won't subdue you.

you'll tie me to the chair and then become so overcome with lust that what was once meant to be a night of punishment becomes an evening of...funishment

I'll call you nurse, and slap your bum.

I will have won the lottery by then, and will just laugh at you.

no. you're just some western tramp. That will be your epitaph.

I am not. I am charming and loveable and the envy of most.

no. drag queens have the worst sense of style and they only ever look ridiculous.

maybe I'm just upset because I can't pull it off. the tops of dresses look weird on me due to not curving and not having slender shoulders. I need a special tailor or something.

they're both too short. COVER UP AND REPENT.

too short, you big ho.

I find that lots of clothes look nicer in theory than they do when on someone!

I'd have to see the dress on.

they're ok I guess. in the end though I dislike feet, so any sandal isn't going to leave me feeling all that enthused

why would you want to cause me distress? I am kind and sweet and help Northerners out! I DO NOT DESERVE THIS TREATMENT!

excuse me while I punch a child to relief this distress.

when I am reincarnated as a woman, I will make better use of my smaller feet than thee

I am just expressing general frustration.

As for that last one...I'm not feeling it.

it would be totally shapeless on me

hm...I am undecided. Let me mull it over.

I dig it! I'd wear it if I had boobs.